I am dead serious when I say that Zoey is doing great, and we all adore her. I know I keep saying this, but she is absolutely a doll. I love her personality-she is so sweet and very gentle, but can totally hold her own against the other 3 and won't take any crap from them.
We had our appointment with specialists at the International Adoption Clinic in Cincinnati-we are so lucky to be 25 minutes away from these people. They were wonderful. Met with the nurse practitioner for an hour-went over her history in China, her brief history with us, development, health issues, etc... We also met with an OT who did an OT/PT/ST evaluation. We then met with Dr. Staat - who was amazingly wonderful. She performed a thorough check up and answered a lot of questions about Zoey's palate. But we weren't done yet-we stayed to meet with a social worker/therapist who got the run-down on our family issues, sleep habits, attachment updates, etc...
The verdict: so far, she is "unusually healthy" for a former orphan from China. On the phone with the clinic when I made the appointment, I was warned that "most adopted children from China have delays...nutritional deficits... blah blah blah" and we were told that once she is here for a while and eating well, we would notice such a difference in her appearance, her hair will become shiny and soft, she will someday be on the growth charts, etc... The result of the meeting with all of these professionals: she is in great shape, she is already on the US growth charts (between 25-50% in her stats), her hair and nails show how wonderful her nutrition has been, and really she is adjusting very well.
After those meetings she received another TB test, a shot, then we headed down to the lab for a blood draw where they took NINE VIALS OF BLOOD. Poor kid-this was after they weren't able to find a vein and had to re-stick her little arms several times-but she is made it out of there without too many tears (we did have some). I was the "rescuer" for the shot, TB test and the blood draw-nothing like terror and follow up comfort to help with the mother-daughter bond. Lol. Poor kid.
On our way home we stopped at P. F. Changs - where I ordered her some noodles and some steamed shrimp dumplings. She woke up from her little nap on my shoulder (more cuddling) and the first thing she did was hunt around for her chopsticks. They were adult-size chopsticks, not the child-size, starter chopsticks that she is best at maneuvering. But she wanted nothing to do with the fork. She would not let me cut her dumplings into more manageable sizes. For those of you who have had steamed dumplings, you may know that they are very slippery-and fairly difficult to manage with those shiny, sleek chopsticks. This is especially difficult for a 3.5 year old girl who is trying to grip them at the top of her giant adult-sized slick plastic chopsticks. I have to give her credit-the determination she showed was quite impressive. Most kids (and adults) would have given up after the first couple tries. Even after the dumpling slipped out of the chop sticks and onto the plate, the table, and nearly hit her lap a couple times (I caught it both times before it went south of the table), she wanted no help from us. I was waiting for it to go airborne and hit the people at the next table-but they remained safe. While trying to hold back a giggle by biting my lip, I tried to eat my own lunch and not focus on the stubborn but adorable girl next to me attempting to control the out-of-control dumpling, even if it meant she would go hungry by doing so. But when she did master it, she ate the whole thing. And then another. We were quite impressed.
Prior to this, Bryan pulled out his chopsticks-she gave him "the look," grabbed the chopsticks from him, turned one around (he was apparently going to violate a code by eating with the wrong end of one of the chopsticks). She then leveled them so the points were even, and handed them back to Bryan. Nothing like a nearly-4 year old giving you a lesson on how to eat. It was very, very funny...
At another lunch with Bryan, this time at Thai 9 in Dayton, she refused to eat when they brought the food. She looked at Bryan and pointed her 2 forefingers out, then bumped her hands together so that her parallel forefingers touched-apparently she wanted chopsticks. Very cute. Even without mastering the English language yet, we totally understand where she is coming from. Most of the time. Really, almost all of the time. We haven't really had to use the Google Translate lately. In fact, we've noticed lately that she really only speaks Mandarin when she is either very mad, or very excited. For the most part, she is rehearsing the English that she knows. Which right now consists of expressions such as "What are you doing?," "stop it," "awesome," the kids' names, and "me" (which can be used to indicate mine, me, the possessive "Zoey's" and "don't forget about ME"). She made the transition today to say "potty" and "hungry," which before this was either the Mandarin version of the words or was our version of sign language/charades.
We seem to be continuing in the right direction in terms of bonding and attachment. She is really taken with Bryan. Me-we are working on it. She calls me "mom," "mommy" and "mama" and we are making a ton of headway in terms of breaking down the walls. But, I have had to go into work and I notice on those days, I am punished for my absence. I do remember this from the other 3, but with her it makes me a little more sad-two steps forward, 1 step back.
We did have 2 noticeable setbacks recently-both involving pictures on the iPad. Since her cleft lip surgery was coordinated and funded by Love Without Boundaries, we were able to, and have, requested her files from LWB. Amazingly, LWB has emailed us pictures, orphanage reports, medical reports, and one report a month since she was 4 months old, consisting of 4-6 pages of a narrative, pictures, medical updates, development updates, and input from the foster mom. I did figure out that she was very close with her foster brother, which explains a little of why she is so taken with Sam. In these LWB updates, there are a lot of pictures, and frequently include Zoey and her foster mom or brother. As I receive them, I am trying to load the pictures on my iPad. Apparently, Bryan is doing the same thing. About a week and a half ago, Zoey was scrolling through my iPad, went to the photos and started looking at pictures of herself. She found one of her foster mom. She stopped, stared at it, then moved to the next one, which was also of the foster mom. She again stopped, stared at it, and then shut the iPad down. She didn't speak to me until the next afternoon.
This past week a similar incident occurred. Bryan had given her his iPad in the car to entertain herself while they drove to the parent lunch at Meghan's school. She had been playing Angry Birds, but when he looked back, he noticed a tear rolling down one of her cheeks. He asked her if she was okay, and she replied "kan" (loosely means look at this/look at me). When he stopped the car, she held out the iPad and showed him the group picture of her orphanage friends with their foster moms. She had zoomed in on herself and her foster mom. She looked at it again. He held his hand out to take the iPad, but she clutched it to her chest and crossed her arms over it. She was a little quiet for a while, he said, but she did well at lunch. When they got back into the car after lunch, she went right for the iPad and back to the pictures, only this time she looked at the ones on there with her new family.
We are settling in pretty well-she really has been doing great. She
still favors Sam the most, but gets along really well with the girls.
She is still not overly crazy about dogs-but is getting better. She
LOVES the bathtub and the shower, she is doing better with milk (vanilla
soy milk has been a hit), and eats pretty much anything I give to her - except I actually got an "Ew, yuck!" when I offered her a PB&J
sandwich (hmm... wonder where she learned that expression-SAM!). Noodles are still her favorite, and she prefers chopsticks. We had a stand off where she did not believe she needed a helmet while riding on her scooter (our driveway has a fairly significant incline), and I had to take the scooter away because she refused to use the helmet. She has since seen my way and wears her helmet every time she steps foot on the scooter-and screams "helmet" to the kids if they aren't wearing theirs.
She spent some time with the sitter last week, and screamed bloody
murder when I left her for the first time. Kim said that she went to change another child and heard the deadbolt on the front door unlock - there was Zoey, trying to escape.
After about 45 minutes she calmed down and did much better. We had gone
over there several times to familiarize her with the place, Kim and the
kids (Morgan, my niece, also goes there), but I think when I left, even though I explained to her what was going on and she understood-that was just
too much. A couple hours later, when I went to pick her up, she was
dancing and singing with the other kids. And when I brought her to my work she skipped out of the car and was so charming with me, it was hilarious. While at Kim's, she had eaten a PB sandwich
with no fights (monster) and played well with the kids. She was quite the hit.
I will keep trying to post some updates here and there. I am amazed every day at who has read this and am so glad we've had a lot of people walking with us in this journey. We are so blessed!
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| I am pretty sure this is near the Chinese New Year her first year-she was about 6 months old. That is her with her foster mom. |
I had these in order before I uploaded them, but it did its own thing when I loaded them on the Blog.
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| I can't get over this coat! This is her official "Chinese New Year coat" from that year. |
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| The LWB reports were a little tough to read-the listed any concerns that the Foster Mom would report. Consistently, from about 18 months on, every month the Foster Mom would indicate she was concerned Zoey would be given up for adoption, since they loved her so much and she fit so well in their family. |
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| This is the group picture she was looking at last week on the iPad-of a lot of kids from either LWB or her orphanage with their foster parents. |
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| November or October, 2011 |
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| Cute cute cute. About 15 months old. And for the record, there is a DOG in the background. |
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| About 9 months old, I think. Look at those cheeks. |
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| 4 months old and soon after her surgery. |
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| 1 week old. The picture's information matches with the date they found her. |
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| The Michelin Baby - multilayering it up in Fuyang. That is the foster brother behind her to the left. I have to point out that recently, she refuses to wear a coat. She now prefers short sleeves and only 1 layer - sometimes 2, despite it being a little chilly here lately. |
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| About a year old. On a scale-with her toy. I might be a little biased, but she is so cute! |
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| Her creations-and her name in her handwriting there on the left. She drew both, and Jenna showed her how to color her drawing in on the right. She did the left. We have labeled a couple things (toothbrushes, bins, etc...) and she gets such a kick out of it-she'll look at them every time and say "Zoey." |
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| Another Dragon's game-hamming it up after the game. |
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| A new purple coat photo from LWB. About December of 2011. |
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| At my work after the near-escape from the sitter's. She is showing me how she can color with 2 hands and 2 different coloring books. lol |
